Chase

All I could do was chase the imprints tattooed in my mind. Lines layer themselves in my head, they settle one by one but in a flash it’s utter chaos, they swirl around like autumn leaves beckoning death. Can you swirl me too, like a child on a carousel with no tomorrow to dread and no yesterday to mourn? When I’m six years old again and my eyes are a brighter hue, I’ll recall the time when sixty was just passing through. And when I’ve found what I wistfully longed for at the hands of the bartender, and the blunts have turned to ash, can you save me from my reflection at the bottom of a bottle?

All I could do was take a break from the chase.

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Undone

Come undone for me
Don’t tell me that you sing
sing me your loudest secrets
your softest pieces

Come undone for me
Don’t tell me that you dance
dance me your stories
dance them one by one

Come undone for me
Don’t tell me that you paint
paint me your mind’s sunrise
and your heart’s sunset

Come undone for me
Don’t tell me that you cook
cook me your fondest memories
your mother’s best, your father’s first

Come undone for me
Don’t tell me that you think
tell me things that make me think
tell me riddles, put my mind in a maze

Come undone for me
Don’t tell me that you sin
Rid me of my qualms
Rip me apart and sway me

Come undone for me
as I undo
the threads
of my soul

Consalita

Amma
I wish I was there
to hold your hand
when you were younger
crossing streets
with your eyes closed.

Amma
I wish I knew
the words to tell you
you are everything
my sunshine and my storm
my strength and my weakness
my love and my fear

Amma
Do you know
I love your name
Consalita
To console
but none
consoled you

Amma
You cut off your wings
So I could have them
No happiness without gratitude
No achievement without perseverance
No knowledge without humility
No me without you

Amma
Yes mama, I pray
to Mother Mary
Mathave rekshikenney
Like you taught me to
she’ll save me
as she saved you

Amma
for what it’s worth
let me repay
your time, your love
your grace, your health
let me put you
on a pedestal
let me console you
Consalita

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Saudade

When I return

will I yearn

for that which you said

I’ll never feel again

Will I long

for the pauses

between each breath

the lanes between each junction

Will I desire

the sound of sunshine

the scent of the city

the touch of your warmth

Will I want

what you said we could have

what we could have been

what we were not

but should be

Will I want me

if I return

and be

another me?

Lipstick red